


he knew well enough

by androgynousmikewheeler



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Angst, Canon - Movie, M/M, Mild Gore, Sonia Kaspbrak's A+ Parenting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-30
Updated: 2020-05-30
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:01:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24451765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/androgynousmikewheeler/pseuds/androgynousmikewheeler
Summary: Eddie’s thoughts as he bleeds out
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak & Sonia Kaspbrak, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Comments: 5
Kudos: 25





	he knew well enough

Eddie chokes on his own blood, desperately trying to get out the words he needs to say. His eyes are on Richie, Richie who watches the rest of the Losers stand up to Pennywise, Richie whose legs can’t decide whether to follow or stay.

He coughs, gesturing weakly for Richie to go, to fight, to kill it.

Richie swallows, throat bobbing, and nods. He dashes after them, leaving Eddie well and truly alone.

That’s what his mother had said when he’d finally left her house. “Don’t leave me, Eddie Bear! You don’t want me to be alone, do you? You don’t want to be alone. Because I’m the only one who really loves you. But that’s why you’re leaving me. Because you want me to die alone! But baby, if you leave me, you’re the one who’s going to die alone.” Whenever his sheets stretched empty beside him, her words echoed in his dreams.

She was right. He’s going to die alone. Alone and scared and tied up by his secrets.

He hears his friends’ voices, yelling. Their voices rise in desperation and then in triumph.

“Just a clown,” he mutters with them, “a stupid cowardly clown.” He coughs again at the effort, red spittle raining down on his already blood soaked shirt.

He smiles, for once in his life unbothered by the mess. If his friends can kill that thing, he can stay alive long enough to see them again, long enough to tell Richie, long enough to not die alone.

His breathing is shallow and his head swims, but he keeps his eyes open, and he scrambles for the words he has to say.

 _I know._ The yelling has stopped. _I’ve always known._ It’s quiet for a second, then he hears them coming, hears that he won’t be alone. _I love you too, Richie._ The world is fading. He can barely keep his eyes open. His breath is rough and painful.

 _I know._ He sees them. They’re alive. They came back for him. _I’ve always known._ He just needs to say the words, but they’re so far away, Richie’s so far away, and he’s so weak. The world is slipping away faster the harder he tries to hold on. He sees Richie’s face, sees thirty years of things unsaid, and then his vision goes black.

_I love you too, Richie._

When they reach him, he’s already gone.

Alone. 


End file.
